Monthly Archives: April 2010

last night as three!

well, our last evening as a family of three has come to a close.  as i type this, watching dancing with the stars, lily is finally asleep in her bed.  overall, it couldn’t have been a better day.  a good friend of mine told me about how it was with her son, and their last night before becoming four.  she told me one of the positives of having a planned c-section, as i’m having, was the opportunity to make the absolute most on their last evening together before the new baby’s arrival the next day.  i wanted to make the absolute most of today.  i woke up this morning without any expectations other than to enjoy lily and all that she is.

after eating breakfast, we ran some errands and then met her grandma for lunch.  then we played at nana and papa’s house for a bit before taking a nap.  after waking up, we met with daddy for our special “last evening as three”.  we wanted it to be low-key and not anything too out of the ordinary from our normal routine.  we went to eat at chick-fil-a so lily could burn some energy and play and slide her butt off!  when she had enough, we went to zip dip (our favorite soft-serve ice cream place in cincy) for ice cream before heading home.

lately, bath time has not been a very positive event.  lily defiantly keeps her eyes open when we wash her face, even despite repeated warnings that the soap will burn her eyes.  this has resulted in many screaming and crying fits in the tub, and i was so worried that tonight would be no exception.  luckily, i was wrong!  after her bath, she had lots of time to jump around on our bed and for tom to make her into “peter pan” by flying her around the house.  we then settled down on our bed and read some books before tucking her into her own.

when she prayed tonight and sang her same “God, our Father” prayer she always does, i couldn’t help but get choked up thinking of how God has truly blessed me with this family.  i tend to focus on what i don’t have instead of what i do.  however, tonight as she sang, it was so innocent and the words were oh so sweet and true for where i am right at this moment.

i can’t wait for the adventure that awaits all three of us in the morning, and more importantly to see the newest gift from God’s pocket that He’s chosen for us!

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paint . . . fabrics . . . and toys . . . oh my!

i love having a reason to decorate.  spending hours dreaming up color schemes, searching for the perfect fabric, and sewing totally does it for me!

when we first found out that we were expecting again, i didn’t really give much thought to how i would decorate a nursery.  i was sure that lily and the new baby would be sharing a room, since all other free space in our cincinnati house was spoken for.  enter my husband . . . who made my decorating dreams come true!  he decided that it would be better for the new baby to get their own room, and that he was fine moving his office from the upstairs to the basement.  how awesome is that?  as soon as we found out that we were having a little boy, i immediately started to panic . . . just a little.  i had no idea what i would want for a little boy’s room.  all themes that i could come up with  seemed like they had already been done before, and better than i could have done . . . rocket ships . . . vintage cowboys . . . airplanes . . . blah blah blah.  i wanted something different and fresh.  well, after literally spending hours scouring websites for fabric and ideas, i decided that i don’t need a theme.  in fact, not pigeon-holing myself into a theme gave me more freedom to do a variety of things and to change over time.

so i decided to just pick a color scheme and go with that.  but what to choose?  i swear that i now know just about every fabric collection from amy butler to joel dewberry.  as soon as i found a fabric that would be masculine enough, i’d find that it had already been discontinued or was going to be way out of my price range.  grrrrr!  one day, i just decided that i was going to joann fabrics and i wasn’t coming out until i had at least two yards of useable fabric for his room in my hands.  voila!  i found it!  as borat would say, “great success!”  i found the coolest green fabric with white detailing that, paired with dark brown accents,  would be the perfect mod yet masculine look i wanted for the room.

i set off to work!  again, since i am of “limited means” these days, i decided to repurpose as many of lily’s things as i could.  besides, i am a picky person and wouldn’t want anyone else making it for me . . . that is with the exception of my mother-in-law and my bestie.  anyway, i took her old crib bumper and recovered it with the fabric, using brown bias tape for the ties.  it was then time to make the crib skirt.  my sewing skills are limited, at best, so i knew that straight lines, sans box-pleats, would work best for me.  i used the same green fabric for the sides and an old piece of fabric for underneath the mattress.  a few hours later it was done.  easy peasy!

if you’ve read this blog before, you know that my husband has a long list of projects that he will never attempt again . . . one of them being painting furniture.  well, i don’t necessarily agree with that!  i had an old dresser (that he had painted white for lily’s nursery) that i wanted to paint green as an accent piece for the room.  knowing i could never ask him to paint it for me, i enlisted the help of my bestie.  let me tell you, everyone should be so lucky to have a friend who is willing to give an entire day to you, sans kiddos, and let your pregnant butt order them from one project to the next!  all jokes aside, it was such a great day and we accomplished so so much. . . painting, organizing, cleaning the basement, hanging fabric for tom’s office, and on and on and on…. not to mention the laughs and great conversation!  the dresser turned out exactly as i had imagined.


that was basically all that was needed for gus’s room to feel complete.  i did do a few minor sewing projects . . . making a nursing cover for myself, a minky blanket for him, burp cloths, appliquéing onesies, and finally his name spelled out on canvas to hang in his room . . . but these didn’t take that much time at all.

it was then time to tackle the playroom!  given that our upstairs is one giant room, i knew we’d have plenty of space for him as well as an entire playroom for lils.  the way that the room is designed gave me the opportunity to make stations for each activity.  we now have set areas for reading, cooking in the kitchen, dress ups, baby dolls, and miscellaneous activities.  it’s awesome, and more importantly, lily loves it.  it also gave me a reason to  break out the sewing machine one last time to make a valance out of alexander henry’s lemon fabric.  i’ve always loved that fabric.  it seems so happy to me and really works well in the room.

when the room was completed, the last thing to finish was lily’s “big girl” room.  not much changed in there from how i had initially decorated.  the majority of her toys moved upstairs to the playroom.  the biggest addition was her big girl bed.  however, like i said in an earlier post, because of the unusual size i had to have a mattress custom made as well as bedding.  i was completely overwhelmed as to how i would get all of this done before he arrives.  i am so so thankful to betsy and my mother-in-law for taking over this project for me.  betsy made the most beautiful quilt out of fabric that i had purchased.  she even made a matching pillowcase to go with it.  even though lily doesn’t appreciate it now . . . like i do . . . i know that in the future she will see how much love and time went into making something special just for her!  i am also super thankful for the sheet sets my mother-in-law made (not to mention the kick – a diaper bag she let me custom design!) . . . again, something i would never know how to do myself!

anyway, we are in our last few days before we grow from three to four.  i can’t believe just how much has been accomplished in such a short time.  again, i owe a ton of thanks to many people, including my parents who helped watch lily while i busily built my nest!  because of all of the work being completed we are able to take these last moments to do some special things with just lily.  not that she’ll have memories of this time, but so i will have some to keep forever.

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out of the mouths of babes . . .

(after mama being ticked off at who knows what…)

lily:  mama, why won’t you talk to me?

mama:  because i’m upset with you.

(minutes later)

lily: (smiling) mama, do you have a happy face now?

mama: (smiling and hugging lily)  yes, lily.  i have a happy face now.  i’m sorry for how i was before.

lily:  it’s ok, mama.  i love you the whole most!

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i scream, you scream, we all scream for…

ice cream!

even if it’s lowfat!!

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keeping it real

my daughter is a total brat today. actually for the past two days now, she’s been a totally different child. i just don’t get it. what the heck happened to my sweet and mostly obedient little girl? it’s as if she’s been replaced by a pms-ing, jonas brother listening, teenager! ick Ick ICK! i’m convinced that she somehow knows i’m out of my mind these days and is allowing God to use her as some kind of crazy character building exercise for . . . me! i guess i’m just going to have to trust Him on this one, even if i do it kicking and screaming (hmmmm, i guess like her?) the whole way there.

gus is coming one week from tomorrow. yes, next freaking week! i can’t even believe it. i have not yet packed for the hospital . . . unless you count a few nightgowns, nursing bras, some giant ass underwear, and a onesie stuffed into a plastic publix bag. my house is a wreck, albeit totally organized. i’ve been building my “nest” for the past few weeks, but haven’t stopped to really, um, clean it. dust bunnies abound underneath his swing and my carpets are so full of lint and dog hair that it makes me sick. oh, and while i’m ranting . . . here’s some advice . . . the ridiculously expensive dyson that my husband insisted we buy totally SUCKS, and i don’t mean in the way that they advertise it should. seriously, it’s a giant yellow piece of crap that takes up too much valuable closet space to be worth keeping around. it doesn’t pick up a freaking thing without first going over it at least 10 times. what a waste.

lily’s “big girl” bed is in the process of being put together. as a testament to how nothing is ever easy and how my decisions are rarely well thought out, i had the bright idea to buy a “vintage” bed over a year ago, in anticipation of the day that would eventually come when she’d grow out of her toddler bed or give it up to a sibling. $60 seemed like a steal when i bought it, though i didn’t really give too much thought to the expense of a custom mattress or sheets for that matter. i also didn’t bother to see how it was assembled before taking it apart. plastic zip-ties should have been a dead giveaway that the head and foot board were not originally meant to be with the body of the bed. my poor husband has made numerous trips to the giant orange hardware store to buy the right kind of drill bits and bolts to affix the pieces . . . not knowing exactly what the heck he was drilling through. iron? steel? anyway, this has resulted in him declaring that he will never . . . n e v e r . . . try to do something like this again. i’m sure he’s just adding this to the long list of “treasures” i’ve brought home that have needed hours of work to make them usable. ugh.

just to add insult to injury . . . every night i look at my fat feet and toes (which, by the way, totally resemble stuffed sausage these days) and count the moments until they reduce back to their normal size. bless my sister-in-law for giving me an a w e s o m e pedicure the other night. for about a day i actually didn’t cringe when i peered over my giant stomach to see them. i can also no longer wear my wedding rings, which isn’t really too bad of a thing since i wouldn’t wear them to the hospital anyway. however, looking at my bare ring finger just makes me feel more naked, more fat and less womanly. sigh.

anyway, i am thankful that this will all be over soon and that i’ll have a little burrito baby to hold against my chest . . . and even better . . .a little face (which i pray looks like my husband’s) to look up at me and know that he is mine and i am forever his.

mmm hmmm . . . i know you're jealous.

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soon there will be four

the days of being a family of only three are quickly coming to a close, and i’m kind of mourning it. any of you parents of two out there know where i’m coming from? don’t get me wrong, i’m so excited to meet this little guy who has been keeping me up at night, who knows just the right place to kick, or tickle me in the ribs! i can’t wait to hold him next to my chest and feel his sweet breath on my skin when he sleeps, or to see the look on tom’s face the first time we hear him cry (thinking back to the moment lily was born . . . still one of the most precious moments of my life so far). i know that there will be many wonderful things to come, yet i can’t help but be a little sad at the same time.

i finally feel like i’m getting the hang of my life as a mama . . . of one. now i’m going back to square one . . . but this time with two. how will i have enough energy to give lily the love and attention she deserves? how can i do this for gus? i know that i’m not alone in these feelings. most of my friends with multiple kids have been in this same situation and have dealt with the same gut wrenching feelings. i know that i’m not unique. yet i’m feeling so isolated these days as his birth draws nearer.

i look at lily and think that her sweet little life is about to change . . . dramatically. believe me, i never wanted an only child. i knew that there would come a time when we would add another member to our family. it’s time. however, i worry that it will somehow alter her personality. (kind of like how polly became a little overshadowed when we added franklin . . . i know, i know, they are just dogs, but hang in there with me.) i know that it will become a new kind of “normal” for all of us. that eventually we will not pine away for the days when it was just the three of us, because gus will have brought something new and special to our lives that only he could. but even with knowing this, i’m still sad and a little scared.

anyway, these are just some of my random musings at 4:30 in the morning, as i sit on my couch, surrounded by pillows, unable to sleep. oh the joys of the final weeks of pregnancy!

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